As children grow up, they eventually leave the family nest to pursue their dreams and aspirations, and that empty nest can encourage depression. Whether they go to college, explore the world, or start a new job, it may be a challenging and emotional step for parents. y, and I am unprepared.
As the end of March is only weeks away, I will move to the next town, and my 19-year-old son will not be coming with me. So far, I have been in denial that I won't have either of my children living with me for the first time. It will just be me and my pup, Buddha. I have caught myself becoming depressed at the thought of an empty nest while packing up the apartment. When this happens, I move to another room to distract myself or stop packing entirely for the time being. I am aware this is unhealthy, and that means I must deal with my upcoming empty nest phase head-on.
Preparing for the Transition
Otherwise, my depression and emotions will become overwhelming, and I will not be able to function correctly. So, how do I plan to prepare for moving? That's a great question. Today, I formed a list of activities (an empty nest wellness toolbox of sorts) that I can initiate when my depression begins to spiral.
This toolbox is designed to remind me that I have options when the sadness feels heavy. From small distractions to bigger proactive steps, it provides a foundation of emotional safety while I step into this new chapter of life. It is about taking control, rather than letting depression take control of me.
Fighting Depression While Becoming an Empty Nester
Here are three coping strategies I am prepared to use to fight depression while becoming an empty nester at the end of the month:
I give myself pep talks. I can't envision myself standing in front of a mirror saying things like, “You've got this” and “You can do it.” When I say pep talk, I mean reminding myself that I am moving to distance myself from the confines of the town I'm in now. I remind myself that I was 20 when I moved out, and now it is my son's turn. Most importantly, I remind myself this is a natural part of life and that he will only be 30 minutes away.
I decorate to my liking. This will be the first time I can decorate my home entirely how I want. In the past, I considered my kids' or husband's opinions. This time, I get to decide where the furniture, photos, and kitchen items go, and I don't have to ask anyone for approval. It may sound small, but it is an empowering way to make this new space feel like mine.
I keep busy. Once everything is unpacked, there will still be quiet moments that could invite depression. To prevent this, I plan to knit, complete puzzles, write blog posts, watch movies, explore new places, and enjoy basketball games with my son—even virtually. Staying engaged helps keep my mood stable.
Empty Nest Sadness Versus Depression
To be sad about my baby boy flying out of the nest is natural, and I will embrace the emotions that are a result of it. All parents react to being empty nesters in different ways, and all their reactions are perfectly normal. How I cope with the emotions of this life event will either allow me to persevere or not persevere through the grief of having my children move out.
The line between sadness and depression can be thin. Sadness is temporary and part of the grieving process, while depression can overwhelm daily life and last longer. Recognizing the difference is crucial so that sadness doesn't escalate into something more harmful.
Looking Ahead with Strength
I know it won't be easy, and I am not looking forward to it. However, I also know that if I'm proactive and prepare myself with coping skills, it will be better than